Wherever You Are, Be There: Welcome to my New Website

I've lived in ten countries across three continents in the past twelve years. I've left breadcrumbs of my views and experiences scattered around in different digital spaces. I started with Hi5, later used MySpace, followed by Facebook, then Twitter, and later Instagram.

As I kept moving from country to country, friends suggested I started a blog. I contemplated the idea a few times, but self-doubt always won. Ironically, for someone who makes her living mostly by writing, I wondered if anything I had to say had any value.

When in deep self-doubt, excuses are excellent tools for self-sabotage

For years, I thought I needed a cool-looking site to start writing because I was always told it's imperative to make a great first impression.

That thought was the seed I used to grow my tree of excuses:

• Oh, I don't have enough money to pay a web designer to do a sassy website that projects my personality.


• Yikes, what's this hosting stuff? Paying for a domain, why, what's that? Oh, that's pricey.


• Ah, but look at the free website templates. I can't find anything that says "me."


• Gosh, what a busy week; my brain is mush, I can't think, let's drink wine and binge watch a TV show to give my brain cells a well-deserved break. (Repeat this every time the little voice in your head whispers, you know you want it and can do it, and this weekend you've got the time to plan it out… Drown her with Malbec! It's such a tangy, fruity, full-bodied way to hinder any productivity.)


• There's absolutely nothing interesting I can write about because I'm not that interesting. Anyways, I thought about this idea, but I noticed that this famous journalist already wrote similar in this big-shot publication, so, bummer, why bother, it's already been said and done.

But it's never really about any of these points, right?

I lacked confidence in myself. I feared that people would find whatever I wrote disappointing at best, a total waste of their time at worst. So, after years of pondering whether to blog or not to blog, my self-doubt won.

New skills, new possibilities, and second chances

I've been working in communications for non-profits for the past decade. After years of working with web developers and designers on maintaining, upgrading, or often revamping websites, I decided to learn to code. I thought it would make it easier for me to explain to my non-digital-savvy colleagues how online products work and manage their expectations. I also wanted to better express to developers and designers what we wanted and needed and why.

It took me five years to make the time and save up the money to do so. Last year I completed a coding course.

Learning to code meant that I could no longer riddle my mind with excuses. I finally had the tools and the knowledge to build something that said "me."

But I didn't want a blog. I wanted to create a space where I could express myself, be creative, a place where I could play, experiment, and improve my coding and design skills.

More importantly, I wanted to house my own content in one place.

In the past, other than my scattered use of social media platforms, I wrote for a few online publications that eventually went offline. I created content and products for some organizations that were deleted during website revamps. That work is gone. Dead. I have nothing to show for it.

I also don't like the idea of someone else owning, controlling, or having rights over my content.

After eight months of trials and errors, several screams of frustration in between, and three prolonged work-related breaks, I built my personal publishing space — my home on the internet.

It's not where I want it to be yet. But I can only get my site there by making mistakes, tweaking and changing things around, and learning in the process. If I keep waiting for it to be perfect, it'll never get anywhere. Something non-existent can't make any impressions.

As for the self-doubt about my writing, I agree with this opinion:

(Let the reader decide what's a waste of time. Write what you want.) @silviakillings @kellyconaboy

— Kate McKean (@kate_mckean) August 23, 2016

From now on, this is where I'll be telling and sharing my stories, my thoughts, and what I care about. Seth Godin is right when he wrote:

[If an idea] merely stays where it is and doesn't join us here, it's hidden. And hidden ideas don't ship, have no influence, no intersection with the market. They die, alone.

👀 Did I miss anything? Make a mistake? Let me know. Share with me your thoughts, suggestions, or critiques. Follow me on Twitter: @e_sarin. Or email me at: elenasosalerin@gmail.com.